The diabetes/time continuum

By | 10 January, 2012

The dodgy pancreas situation also seems to impact on my perception of time. While most of my life is lived in normal time, there’s quite a chunk that exists in diabetic time…

  • Time you think it should take for any hypo treatment to kick in: 30 seconds
  • Time it actually takes for you to believe hypo treatment has kicked in: minimum 10 minutes, on a good day
  • Time you can ignore an impending low for and convince yourself that food mightn’t be required: if watching TV, the brain can normally convince you that the impending low can wait until the next advert break. If not, it’s generally a random period of self-delusion and procrastination
  • Time you can continue to do the hoovering after first feeling low: about 10 minutes before the hoovering starts to get almost physically impossible
  • Time it takes for you to think the dilating eye drops are working at the opticians: 10 seconds
  • Time it takes for the eye man to think they’re working: minimum 20 minutes
  • Time spent randomly reading posters in the waiting room and looking at your phone to see if things have got any blurrier yet: minimum 19 minutes, 50 seconds
  • Time you spend putting off changing an infusion set because you’re too busy: hours/days
  • Time it takes to actually change an infusion set: 1 minute
  • Time it takes for the influence of pizza to leave your body: it feels like days, but I suspect technically it’s more like hours
  • Time it takes for your heartbeat to return to normal after you realise with a sinking feeling that you’ve forgotten to inject for lunch: minutes
  • Time it takes for your blood sugar to return to normal after you realise you’ve forgotten to inject for lunch: hours
  • Time it is acceptable for a blood glucose meter to spend thinking about a result: 5 seconds
  • Time it takes for my GP surgery to get my repeat prescriptions right first time, every time: a lifetime
  • Time within which we can expect to be cured – a rolling 10 year period with no specified end date

Are there any other aspects of the diabetes/time continuum I’ve missed?

9 thoughts on “The diabetes/time continuum

  1. Tim

    Time you expect a hospital appointment to take – 30 minutes
    Time spent sitting in waiting room + appointment – 2 hours

    Reply
  2. JaneC

    Time waiting to get approval for a pump- expected 2 months.
    Reality- a year. Although it will be an Omnipod next week.

    Reply
  3. Mike

    Time it takes for ‘rapid acting’ insulin to begin to take effect on day 1 (when at the lower-end of normal range before a tasty meal): 1.5 minutes

    Mmmmmmm! Pasta and Fruit Pastille surprise

    Time it takes for ‘rapid acting’ insulin to begin to take effect on day 2 (when trying to correct a pesky high): 1.5 hours.

    Can I have my lunch yet? Oh no. It’s only 4.45. Better leave it another 40 minutes or so.

    Reply
    1. Megs

      Time spent wondering how a clinic can be running 1 hour late when you arrive for your appointment at 8.50am.

      Reply
      1. jennifer pinder

        Mostly because the staff are late to work , dither around and dont get started , overbooked , patient before you 20 mins late but still gets seen before you , healthcare assistants dont turn up for testing poor staff management , different drs each time who spend 10 mins of your appointment looking at the records and having to learn about you ..

        Reply
  4. Annette A

    Time a pharmacist thinks a tube of test strips lasts (a week. No questions.) versus time a tube lasts in the diabetes world (anywhere from 2.5 days when things are seroiusly screwed up to up to 10 days when things are hunky dory and I only need to test for meals.)

    Reply
  5. lady up north

    Time taken in a previously unvisited corner shop to grab Lucozade when impending low propels you through door, after stumbling up step and knocking OAP to floor 30 minutes

    Reply

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